Part 1 of this thread is here: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=333846.new#newHi All,
Just a short update: I recently phoned my mother for a chat.
She told me my brother won't be staying with us after all: we're too busy, we'll be renovating (yes, in May, not in June!), and they need to share her car. In short, it was too much of a hassle, and so they'll be staying at my mother's tiny appartment instead.
Good thing I suggested doing something together to my brother, or we would not seeing them at all! She is whisking them away on a mini hotel trip for 3 of the 6 days they'll be in the country.
My mother will be joining us for the afternoon trip together btw, she is so looking forward to having all her children and grandchildren together
On the bright side: no more need for any anxiety, I guess. Ha!
Wow...just wow.
Panda,
Really? Why?
I keep making excuses in my head why she's doing this. Maybe it's just because I've set boundaries and have thus pushed her away too much? Maybe she is just as insecure as I am, and feels she would be 'disturbing' me? It still hurts though. S8 fell on Monday. He has a huge bruised black eye. I sent her a picture, saying he fell and was okay except for the swelling. She called our landline and talked to S8 (who happened to answer the phone). She chatted with him, said her goodbyes and hung up.
In all my adult life, I think she has phoned me less than a dozen times. Heck, not even half that! If she needs something, she'll send an e-mail. She expects me to phone regularly and ask how she's doing, but she will never initiate such a call herself. Over the years, when she would start complaining that I didn't call regularly enough, I always reminded her that she was free to take some initiative as well. It never changed anything though.
Thank you all for your replies and support. It means a lot.
Libra.