Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
April 20, 2024, 04:26:39 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
Cat Familiar
,
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Need help with bpd partner getting too much
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Need help with bpd partner getting too much (Read 367 times)
Lastlovelost
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Together
Posts: 4
Need help with bpd partner getting too much
«
on:
April 01, 2021, 05:22:31 PM »
Hello,
My partner has been diagnosed with bpd and is currently on a waiting list to get treatment and has been for some time now. Meanwhile, nothing gets better and the emotional abuse continues. We have been on and off for 2 years and now have a 10 week old baby in the mix. I am scared that the bpd will get too much and beat us. I am scared that it will get too much for me and defeat me. I am scared that the bpd will affect my child and the abuse will continue.
I don't know how to deal with the constant name calling, blaming for her triggers, being told its over and told to leave. It's really getting me down. I don't know how to protect myself and set boundaries or stick to them. I am drowning and emotionally exhausted. Things have gotten so bad I sometimes have felt as if ending my life would make things better for her. But I do not want to do that as I love her and want to help her get better and be there for her and my baby.
I need advice and help. Trying to approach the subject of getting her private DBT therapy has gotten me nowhere in the past and I am afraid that bringing the subject up again will cause more outbursts. We are currently going through couples therapy (eith little success as she refuses to engage in the exercises outside of the meetings, stating they won't work because of her BPD).
I feel alone, stuck and helpless. I am her emotional punching bag. Damned if I do and damned if I do nothing. Please can anybody give me some advice on how to cope and how to deal with loving someone with BPD.
Thank you in advance.
Logged
PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.
once removed
BOARD ADMINISTRATOR
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 12626
Re: Need help with bpd partner getting too much
«
Reply #1 on:
April 02, 2021, 01:34:30 AM »
the first thing to know is that things really can get better.
loving someone with a very challenging disorder is, in itself, very challenging. you will need a strong support system. you will need tools. you will need practice at them. and you will also need a level of acceptance that while things can improve, the person you love will always be a difficult person.
right now, it sounds like your relationship is suffering from stress overload.
people with bpd especially do not deal well with stress. who does, right? and its a stressful environment for both of you. shes just been diagnosed with what is a life altering diagnosis, shes pregnant, and the two of you are going at it.
but now that youve reached out for support, things really can get better.
tell us more about what is going on between the two of you, whats happening when you fight?
Logged
and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
> Topic:
Need help with bpd partner getting too much
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...