its important to determine what the goal is in seeking therapy.
Yes, I absolutely would not tell my uBPDw I was seeking therapy about BPD. She is not aware of BPD at all...
I was thinking it would be beneficial to work with a therapist who has experience working with BPD spouses, so they understand the nuances of the counterintuitive relationship dynamic.
I've learned a lot over the past 20 months, however I'd like a therapist to help me put more structure around steps I can take to get out of the FOG a little more, be less fearful of conflict and be less co-dependent and enabling.