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Author Topic: Neighbor  (Read 428 times)
2scoops
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Other
Relationship status: Neighbour
Posts: 1


« on: February 28, 2022, 11:01:23 AM »

Hello
First time here. Need to clarify the person I am inquiring about isnt a child (she acts like one)
She is my neighbour and is 25 y/o. She just moved in 5 months ago above me. Our 1st contact was i heard screaming upstairs and crying. My 84 yo father lives with me and he said she woke him up at 6:30am and he thought it was a child having temper tantrum (lasted all day/afternoon). We thought for weeks she had children. She stomps around, etc. Next, i received a letter in our mailbox profusely apologizing saying she left abusive relationship and thats why we might have heard crying, etc). We were empathic and offered support telling her not to worry. I gave her my cell number just in case of emergency.
Next, she came to our door with cat (we have a young border collie so chaos ensued) stating she locked herself out and could we help. My dad eventually got in. I realized during this encounter that something was off. She seemed too innocent and nice/sweet... very child like and quiet. I got the sense she was wanting us to rescue her.
Next.. she texted me to borrow snow shovel..was going to attack snow around our cars. I suggested her to wait as landlord was going to plow. I now have her #
Next... we heard several times yelling and swearing coming from upstairs.  We were growing increasingly concerned that her ex was back but only heard her. We thought perhaps she was on telephone with him.
Next.. neighbours moved in beside her. (We occupy entire bottom of house and they occupy top.) Within days, she was screaming and swearing and banging around at top of lungs. I texted her if she needed help, if everything was ok. No response. We left it bc we only heard her voice and no one else. About 4-5 days later, it escalated..louder and longer and we went up at 1 am. Knocked. No answer and spoke with new neighbours. They said she has been doing it everyday. We were still concerned maybe boyfriend came back into pic.  About 2:30 am she txted me back saying she has BPD and the neighbours were playing their music loudly and triggered her. (We have never heard them) she accused them of operating a trap house. (We have not seen any evidence of that.  We hardly hear anything from their half of upstairs.)
To make a long story short, this has been going on every other night. When i text to ask her to please keep noise down she says its them and she is just a reaction to their noise. To deal with the root problem. I asked her to call landlord..she said she did. I also said to call the police if she cant contain herself. She comments with "abuse my space abuse me" and gets sarcastic and verbally abusive towards me. Alot of double standards.. she has had treatment (dbt and CBT) but she doesnt appear to be using any tools. Alot of the large volume of txts from her is "poor me" and blaming everyone else... and vulgar. She accused neighbour of lying about his name etc. I suggested she speak with them and ask they turn down their blaring music with a lot of bass..(that we cant hear?)  She also texted she blares her music to drown out theirs. That her wall pictures shake..thats how loud her music is. (I feel gaslit bc we dont hear any music..at all). As mentioned, i have my 84 yo father who recently had triple bypass and an easily excitable border collie living with me. My dog gets anxious and wont settle at 1 am when she is screaming and my dad looks upset. HELP!  What do I do and how do I get her to be quiet?
Thank you!
« Last Edit: September 28, 2022, 05:59:53 AM by Skip » Logged
Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
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