Nice to virtually meet everyone!
I recently learned that my husband may have BPD with some NPD traits in there as well. Here’s the crazy part- we’ve been married for 24 years! I know, right?
Here’s a little backstory:
We’ve been together since we were 16. We had our first kid our senior year of high school and two more 7-8 years later. We’ve always had “communication” issues. He has always had a lot of anger and is very quick to anger, often at nothing.
A few months ago we started marriage counseling to finally try to fix our communication issues. We’ve been going weekly until a few weeks ago when our counselor stated we needed to do individual counseling because I told her I was ready to quit counseling. I was ready to quit because “everything was my fault”. Even in counseling it would feel like we were making headway and that he was finally hearing me only to leave and then “get in trouble” for things I’d said in counseling. When she suggested this, my husband thought it was a really good idea for me as I needed to work on things. She offered him weekly sessions, but he said he didn’t need them, that we’d pick up marriage counseling again when I had healed.
So, I just had my second one on one yesterday and she said she’s fairly confident he has BPD and has been also trying to “rule out” NPD. She suggested I read the book Stop Walking on Eggshells and get back to hear. Oh holy cow! I’m totally blown away. I’ll admit I’d barely heard of BPD before yesterday and being halfway through this book already it’s like a light bulb has gone off. Wow wow wow. It’s like it was written in our living room. Unconventional BPD with HCP all over.
So, you’ve read this far, thanks! I’m super looking forward to reading and learning as much as I can not only about the disorder, but more importantly, how to respond and deal with these issues as they come up.
