i want to help my partner

[Depression = 72% of members]

I am a medical professional with a partner who has all of the symptoms of BPD but is yet undiagnosed.  I suspect that he has had a very rocky marriage, is not married anymore.  I have been with him for more that 3 years and about 9 months ago, he snapped.  He started rifling around with intense emotions on a daily basis:  accusing me of not loving him, being in love with someone else.  He had an affair with his secretary---behavior seemingly uncharacteristic for him;  He is a binge-eater, addicted to pornography, and reckless driver.

i want to help him, but I do not know how.

HELP

[enaid]

I am a medical professional with a partner who has all of the symptoms of BPD but is yet undiagnosed.  I suspect that he has had a very rocky marriage, is not married anymore.  I have been with him for more that 3 years and about 9 months ago, he snapped.  He started rifling around with intense emotions on a daily basis:  accusing me of not loving him, being in love with someone else.  He had an affair with his secretary---behavior seemingly uncharacteristic for him;  He is a binge-eater, addicted to pornography, and reckless driver.

i want to help him, but I do not know how.

HELP

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[VitaminC]

Hi there,

Welcome! I'm glad you found us. I know you will find many useful resources here, both clinical literature and member's experiences, that will surely be helpful to you.

A really good place to start is in the links over on the right side of this page >>>>
Learning more about the disorder and the various communication tools will put you in a better position to help your relationship, your partner, and not least of all yourself.

It sounds like the first two years or so of your relationship were ok ? Did anything in particular happen about 9 months ago that might have caused your partner to "snap"?
How have you coped with it so far? How are you feeling?

Look forward to hearing more from you and bringing this great community into your life in a really helpful way!

 

[Mutt]

Hi enaid,



I'd like to join Vitamin C and welcome you to bpdfamily. I'm sorry to hear that. The push / pull behavior from a pwBPD can feel like crazy making behavior to the non-disordered partner. It helps to talk to people that share similar experiences, you're not alone.

Do you have kids together? How's your support network? Do you have a non judgemental friend or family member in real life that you can confide in? What do you for self care?


Hang in there,


----Mutt