unBPDex made contact after 1 month

[mar356]

unBPDex made contact after a few months of not hearing from her.  I'm not really looking to get recycled but would like to remain cordial.  It is like they have a six sense and know exactly when to contact you out of the blue.

In brief: Started to date a new girl and she got depressed and shut down and stonewalled me out of the blue.  Not sure why they do this I think it is a defense mechanism?  Than after feeling down about this I get a message from the BPDex.

Also, how would you approach the BPDex just ignore?

Any help would be wonderful.

[once removed]

can you elaborate a bit on the nature of her contact? whatd she say?

[mar356]

"can you elaborate a bit on the nature of her contact? whatd she say?"

Just had a unexpected accident/crash that day and reached out to me... Than started making small talk with me... .

[once removed]

okay. so whats your goal? you want a friendship, or just to be cordial?

[mar356]

okay. so whats your goal? you want a friendship, or just to be cordial?

To be cordial.  I don't know if this is a pattern they use to recycle?  They get close with someone else than as they get too close they pull away and recycle the ex it seems.

[once removed]

a recycle takes two willing parties.

do you want to revive the relationship?

[mar356]

"do you want to revive the relationship?"

Not at this time.

[once removed]

okay. then her intentions are irrelevant as far as your actions are concerned.

a cordial response looks to me, something like "yikes, im so sorry to hear that! hope youre okay!"