Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 10:38:41 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Experts share their discoveries [video]
100
Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Tools for the pwBPD  (Read 331 times)
JoeBPD81
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 709



WWW
« on: March 27, 2017, 04:25:09 PM »

Hey,

this site is helping me to be more helpful, understanding and communicate better. Also to take care of myself a bit more. But I get the feeling from most posts that the pwBPD won't get better, we just have to handle them better... .

And I wonder if you know a book, or texts, videos... .That would help them feel a bit optimistic about their lives, that will tell them it can be a life worth living. That will explain the thought processes and feelings without making it sound like they are bad people. Like a self help book, but specific for borderline.

My SO just got the diagnosis 2 months ago and then her therapist fell sick, and we don't know when she is coming back. Kind of left her with the burden and no tools. She feels crushed by the weight of being 'incurable', and living a life that she can't stand while hurting everyone around her. She fears losing all that makes her herself and having to become another person in order to "fix herself". She fails to see how that can be worth it.

Any recommendations?
Logged

We are in this together.
PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

Naughty Nibbler
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Posts: 1727



« Reply #1 on: March 27, 2017, 09:51:33 PM »

Hey aJoeBPD81:   

I'm so sorry your wife's therapist has been ill.  One key thing for pwBPD is for them to learn ways to tame their emotions and find ways to self-soothe.  DBT is a type of therapy that is frequently used for people with DBT.  There is a lot of material to choose from in the links below.

The first link below leads to a self-help DBT website.  The 2nd link, DBT Skills Training, relates to a DBT book, ":)BT Skills Training Workshop and Handouts".  It makes some lessons available to the public.  It appears as if the lessons could stand alone, without the book.  If you explore the website, there is mention of a Facebook group, and perhaps a waiting list.  I'd think it might be best to jump in without the Facebook option, but it might be something to consider exploring.

DBT SELF-HELP WEBSITE:
www.dbtselfhelp.com

DBT SKILLS TRAINING
https://dbtskillstraining.wordpress.com/

Books about BPD's who recovered:

The Buddha & The Borderline - Kiera Van Gelder (E-Book and Paperback)

Get Me Out of Here - Rachel Reiland (Used Paperback only)

You might be interested in reading a couple of books yourself. "Feeling Good", by David D. Burns, MD is reviewed in the Learning Center, Book Section on this website.  My therapist recommended  The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris. I found that I could access some online material to assist with participating in some exercises suggested in The Happiness Trap. Perhaps, you and you wife might be able to do something like the mindfulness exercise together.

EXERCISES - FROM BOOK" THE HAPPINESS TRAP"
https://www.thehappinesstrap.com/free_resources


Logged
JoeBPD81
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 709



WWW
« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2017, 05:34:38 AM »

Thanks a lot. I'll be checking all of them.
Logged

We are in this together.
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!