I'm new and looking for guidance. Relationship is about to fall apart.

[Flower Mama]

Hey everyone,

I've been living with my borderline boyfriend and our 2 year old and we've been having problems for about a year. I've gone through the steps of confusion, outlook- reading all I can about BPD and trying to get him help (He's been in DBT therapy for 3 weeks so far), and recently Ive been doing some inner reflection. I'm coming to the realization that I can no longer live with him, but I want to continue our relationship. I'm hopeful because he is in therapy. I just need my separate space because home is so toxic with him there. I haven't proposed this idea yet. He's suicidal, so I'm scared how that will go. Anyone gone through something like this? Living separately, but continuing your relationship?

Best,
Flower Mama

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[once removed]

hi Flower Mama, and

im sorry to hear about the circumstances that have brought you here, but i am glad you found us. there is hope.

it sounds like youve made up your mind that it would be best to remove yourself physically from the home, and i can certainly understand your concerns about him being suicidal and how things will go.

how long have the two of you been together? you mention that the home environment is toxic, can you give us some examples? do you have a plan together logistically as far as a new home?

[Mutt]

Hi Flower MaMa,



I'd like to join once removed and welcome you to bpdfamily. I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a difficult time. I can't say that I have, I'm sure that another member has. I have a couple of suggestions, the best combination for help is seeing a T concurrently with s'a support group. Are you seeing a T? ( therapist )  please correct me if I'm wrong here, I think that you're asking for an exit plan while your SO is SI and continue the r/s?

I'd also like to suggest to spend time with family and friends, it's important when your SO is says my only negative things about you, you mentioned confusion, if you're only hearing one side of things ( all negative ) it's distortion. It helps to hang out with people that have positive things to say about you.