Glad you posted. Welcome.
Yes, yes I have. My son also likes to blame me, blame his dad for many things including having him and bringing him into the world.
It's hard. It's challenging. It contributes greatly to my feelings of shame and my feelings of being inadequate.
But...I have done the best I could. I have tried my best with what I had and what I knew/know.
I am now going to work very hard on supporting him from afar. And build a different relationship with him. If I can. I want to be supportive and not enabling. I want to live with peace. I want to live in kindness.
And that I can change for me.
I hope you feel less alone knowing others have similar thoughts and struggles.