Looks like it is divorce for me

[Dave89]

Hey mate,

How are you doing lately? I would like to know.

I am feeling a little bit lows now, but not as bad. My divorce is just a week away. I had chat with my wife (she called and we talked for 2 hours) and it was good week ago, she was doing much better, I cried for few days, but I also realised that it is just for short time and we have no future together, at least not for upcoming years. And I also have shoulder surgery just the day after tomorrow, that I have been delaying for 6 years!

So yeah, a lot of things on my mind, including that I am thinking of my future family if and when I am gonna have one that is normal and not crazy like last one 

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[gadget]

Hi Dave89! 

I'm good.  Getting better every day.  We had Thanksgiving as a family.  My wife stayed for 4 hours.  Wasn't as awkward as we all thought it would be.  We still get along well.  When she left she hugged me and kissed my forehead.  I thought that was sweet and showed she still cares about me even if she doesn't want to be married to me.

I started casually looking for someone new.  In fact, I'm going to a cooking class/meet & greet tonight!  My wife says she wants me happy, doesn't want me to be alone, wants me to find someone new.  We are only separated now, but I'm finding out on what it takes for a divorce.  Will take time and money I'm sure.

Positive thoughts/prayers for you on your divorce and surgery.  I'm sure you'll do great.  I pretty much have graduated from therapy and no longer need to go.  Therapist believes I'm coping incredibly well.  I'm still going at least one more time on Dec 11th.

Keep in touch!

Gadget

[Dave89]

Thank you, I am pleased to know you are doing well! It has been so much mess, but you have been doing great. Me and my therapist, , I don´t know if I help her or she helps me more  Anyway I will keep on doing my therapy for few more months, although I could finish now, but I still have some last issues I want to address. Now we are on same level, that is for sure.

And thanks for good wishes, I will let you know how it goes after this crazy week will be done! I also have one girl, I have no ideas, if something will happen, but we will have to see, she is a pilot and flight instructor, but much important to me, a really nice and humble girl and we share almost all interests, including psychology topics. But she has had some abusive relationships before and it takes some 3 weeks to get one reply from her, , but we will see how it goes. I am ready to wait even few years if the person is really good, it doesn't matter, maybe she needs some time with herself, just like me too. All the best for you too in finding your new match! I am happy for you.

[Dave89]

any updates?
how did Christmas and new year go?

[gadget]

Hi Dave89!

Good to hear from you.  Christmas was fine but awkward.  My kids all pitched in and bought me a Nintendo Switch.  I’ve been having fun playing that.  Nothing happened for New Years.  Didn’t talk to my ex nor did she wish me a Happy New Year.

I try not to think of her much at all anymore. Not fun when I do see her.  I’m working on getting things together for legal separation/divorce.  Not fun at all.  I dread it.

I’m trying a bit of online dating. I even went to a cooking class/meet and greet.

Gadget