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Author Topic: FAQ: Could it be multiple comorbid personality disorders?  (Read 6546 times)
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Gender: Female
Posts: 91

« Reply #25 on: November 29, 2011, 03:09:32 PM »

From the time I read about BPD after my breakup, I knew that my ex was indeed personality-disordered (he even mentioned that he had been diagnosed with a PD). He exhibited all 9 of the DSM characteristics to varying degrees of severity. I had read about BPD before, in the context of a friend who committed suicide about 5 years before I met my ex.

Whether or not you'll ever learn about a diagnosis is irrelevant. Questioning ourselves on the severity of our loved one's problems is how a lot of us got really deep into destructive relationships.

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Posts: 129

« Reply #26 on: November 29, 2011, 04:02:03 PM »

"What I still can't understand is how they get such a strong hold on you.  What makes me want to be with crazy so bad?  I really don't get it."

There is a psychological term for this, but it escapes me at the moment.

It is quite common, for those exposed to abusive relationships (whether physical or emotional) to feel like they are helpless to get out and the abuser has a hold on them.  Believe it or not, this is the norm, for people who go through this and it happened to me as well.

Eventually, the line is crossed once to often and the victim of the behavior breaks out of the chains.  Others will ask you; why did you stay in that relationship for that long?  Well, we all wish it was that easy, don't we.
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Posts: 129

« Reply #27 on: November 29, 2011, 04:23:10 PM »

The term I was looking for is; "Operant Conditioning"

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Gender: Female
Posts: 4

« Reply #28 on: April 27, 2012, 02:49:38 PM »

I think it is always best to leave it to a professional to do a diagnosis as serious as BPD(or ANY other PD/mental illness).

From my personal experience and from what I have read, there is indeed a high risk of comorbidity between BPD and other mental disorders.  In my personal situation, my dBPsil was first diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa and OCD years ago (early 20's). (in fact, it is when I got more information about these disorders that I kept bumping in BPD as being often co-morbid with these 2 and started to suspect that she had that as well). Now in her 30's her BPD came to take over all of our lives and she finally got the official diagnostic of BPD after spending 5 weeks in an external clinic (at a mental health institution).  Fortunately, she checked in at the hospital by herself (she was suicidal) and she is willing to get help. She is now in a treatment program (external clinic, but full time) that should last a minimum of 2 years. 

All that to say that a "full" diagnostic by a mental health professional is preferable in order for them to get the much needed help they need.  My dBPsil said that all these years she felt that there was more to it then the anorexia and OCD and that she now feels relieved to finally know what is wrong with her... She has got her work cut out in front of her and so do we, but at least we now know what we are dealing with...

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Posts: 299

« Reply #29 on: August 06, 2012, 11:58:26 AM »

Something I read online. The most co morbid diagnosis with BPD's is eating disorders. How many of you folks here on this message board know if your ex BPD has an eating disorder. Mine does. In fact she has had it ever since she was in her 20's and she is now 49 yrs old. She was able to keep it from me for 8 years by staying up later than me, binging, then she would go and vomit. Once in awhile I would hear her vomit and she would say that something did not agree with her. I took it at face value, being the naive trusting person that I am.

Dear jalk,

My wife does too. The more she's stressing, the more she eats. Later, she'll spend entire days starving so she doesn't gain weight... It's like a cycle.

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Posts: 299

« Reply #30 on: August 06, 2012, 12:10:43 PM »

Fascinating topic. I know that research has linked ADD/ADHD in girls to BPD. I wouldn't be surprised if clinical depression, bipolar and other genetically inherited mental health problems can lead to BPD. It makes sense if you think about it. My mom and I both have ADD, and she has BPD as well. ADD can cause a lot of problems; drifting off when people are talking to you, feeling slow in school, not being able to focus on social interactions and behave appropriately; these make developing healthy relationships that much harder and I believe have contributed to my mom's feelings of inadequacy and self-loathing, and ultimately her BPD. Luckily for me, I was able to get into treatment at a young age and was spared the potential of developing BPD for myself (phew on that one!).

The interesting thing to me is that while ADD and bipolar are genetic and managed with medication and therapy throughout a person's life, BPD is (supposedly) much more curable IF the person wants to get better. The IF is the big question though...

When my wife was a teen, she was treated for ADD with Strattera. She stopped because it caused her heart problems. I do have ADD too and am taking Concerta LP daily since about 4 years ago.

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Posts: 389

« Reply #31 on: August 19, 2013, 02:53:38 PM »

my xBPDgf has many co-morbid diagnosis.  she kept them from me and/or downplayed them initially.  it wasn't until i was "hooked" that it was all revealed to me, layer by layer.  apparently the trigger was becoming emotionally close to me.  then after she initiated physical intimacy with me, things went off the chart.  her official dx's (that i am aware of, there could be others?) included:


bulimia (binging AND purging)







alcoholic (at her worst?  1/2 gallon of vodka every day to keep away DT's)

a dissociative disorder (by end of our r/s i even began to wonder if maybe multiple personalities)

UNOFFICIALLY, i came to believe that she had other PD's, including Histrionic PD, Narcissistic PD, as well as a growing problem w/hoarding

it was excruciatingly painful to watch her spiral down the way she did.  she ended up in prison, which is apparently the new state sanctioned treatment of choice, the new "asylum", if you will.


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Person in your life: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1358

« Reply #32 on: May 11, 2018, 05:57:23 AM »

Hi board   just wanted to chime in that I found this information useful. Thanks Skip!

~ If you are recovering from a failed relationship, the important thing is often to understand which behaviors were pathologic (mental illness) and which were just the normal run of the mill problems common to failing/failed relationships - there is often a bias to assign too much to the "pathology" and not enough to common relationship problems, or the issues we created by our own behaviors.

Analyzing comorbidity data is a complex matter that probably exceeds most of our laymen skills   smiley 
Comorbid w/BPD ... Narcissistic ... Men 47% ... Women 32%

Don't become an Amateur Psychologist or Neurosurgeon  While awareness is a very good thing, if one suspects a mental disorder in the family it is best to see a mental health professional for an informed opinion and for some direction - even more so if you are emotionally distressed yourself and not at the top of your game. 
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