Quotes from the pwBPD in my life

[VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?"]

I hate you , i love you... .repeat for 5 years

You only see the worst in me... .repeat for 5 years 

I cant get anything right... .repeat for 5 years 

You control me and are a bully... .umm dont think so.

I dont cheat and i dont lie... .err here is the proof

And everyones fave... .He is just a friend and you are paranoid, you are my soul mate... .the classic!

[joop]

I hate you , i love you... .repeat for 5 years

You only see the worst in me... .repeat for 5 years 

I cant get anything right... .repeat for 5 years 

You control me and are a bully... .umm dont think so.

I dont cheat and i dont lie... .err here is the proof

And everyones fave... .He is just a friend and you are paranoid, you are my soul mate... .the classic!

[jalk]

I have to share... .I just love reading these sayings BPDer's say... .here are a few I have heard... .see if they ring a bell.

1. Do you hate me?

2. Do you still love me?

3. I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm like this.

4. I prayed for someone like you.

5. You're the best.

6. You're so good looking, I'm glad you're mine.

7.You're flirting with her!

8. I don't know who I am.

9. You always have to have everything your way!

10. I love you googles and googles

11. Please don't ever leave me

12. You love your dogs more than me!

13. I need my privacy!

14. My mother is in "one of her moods" again.

Just to name a few. I have more. Just can't think of them now.

Bonus... .

- You're the best thing that ever happened to me

- I'd die without you

- If you hate me so much, then just leave me

- He's just a friend (gah, I hate that spineless statement)


Oh yeah... .

1. They are "just a friend"  (this means... she's having an affair)

2. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me

3. You're my rock

4. I can always depend on you

5. Leave me alone!

6. Quit looking over my shoulder! (when she is on computer, which was most of the time. She kept separate e-mail account. When I made my own e-mail account, she became threatened)

7. This is fate. We are meant to be.

8. We never do anything together!

9 You are always making me late! I'm sick of this! ( we were not late... .her fling was at this function and she wanted to get there a.s.a.p)

10. This relationship is in trouble! a couple days later after her fling broke off relationship my ex told me... .WE ARE THROUGH!  A couple weeks prior... .I was the best thing since chocolate. Then she lied about her fling.

11. We are just friends! We watch each others backs.

12. When asked if she is seeing X... her reply... "Of course I see X... we are friends and its none of your business who I am interested in."  (wow! she was still living with me until she found her "own place"... .I should have kicked her cheating lying ars out right then and there. She moved in with X when she walked out my door)

[OnceConfused]

After reading a book on Zen, she proudly said to me:

" I am way beyond Zen!".

That is beyong profound - bordering arrogance and cockiness

[MM]

Always/never always/never always/never... .     

[muddychicken]

I do everything around here, I feel like a single mom. What do you do around here for me? (Gee I don't know... .put up with your abusive mouth for 17 years)

[just_think]

After reading a book on Zen, she proudly said to me:

" I am way beyond Zen!".

That is beyong profound - bordering arrogance and cockiness

I can taste the irony across the internet.

Interestingly, DBT is rooted in zen meditation I believe.

[gea1911a1]

After I told her I was filing - "I spent my whole life caring for you and the kids I can't believe you're doing this to me!"  "The kids will now get what they want - you all to themselves."  "I'll never be able to see my children or grandkids again".  etc, etc

[jboogie]

after many of her nighttime rages:

"now youre not gonna make love to me... .i cant believe you would neglect your wife like that"

there were many nights  where i had to make a choice... .either have sex and get it over with and get to sleep, or listen to her rage for a few more hours, and be up most of the night.

what a life!

[muddychicken]

after many of her nighttime rages:

"now youre not gonna make love to me... .i cant believe you would neglect your wife like that"

there were many nights  where i had to make a choice... .either have sex and get it over with and get to sleep, or listen to her rage for a few more hours, and be up most of the night.

what a life!

Oh yea can identify with this. It wasn't even make up sex, it was sick.  And yes like you, better to get it over with and stare out the window into the darkness wondering what my life had become. Div. in 7/10.

[ItsAboutTime]

Had anyone else noticed that the word 'always' as in, I will always love you, doesn't seem to be in their vocabulary?

[TheSomberlain]

Had anyone else noticed that the word 'always' as in, I will always love you, doesn't seem to be in their vocabulary?

On the contrary, that is a word frequently used by my ex. That goes along with black and white thinking. It was either always or never, love or hate, best or worst, etc.

[joop]

Had anyone else noticed that the word 'always' as in, I will always love you, doesn't seem to be in their vocabulary?

Pearly

As my ex freely admitted ' i dont put all my eggs in one basket'... .think that might answer your question on the word ' always'... .always needs to be substituted for today or in this moment i love you

[snappybrowneyes]

Hmmm my pbdh uses always all the time!

"I will always love you"

"Why do you always have to have the last word"

Why do you always hammer me in an argument"

Ugh!

[muddychicken]

Love that eggs in one basket quote-exNPDgf used to say it when we were reaching our breaking point and she wanted to exert control... .my response "ok, sorry you feel that way, how do you want this r/s to look." Well that would throw her for a loop cuz I really felt that way. I was on the way out. 

[samedeepwaterasu]

This is simple.

"You hate me!"

How many heard this from their BPD SO?

[leia]

one time at night, i had just woken up, he whispered to me

"i could never push you away" ... this has been spinning in my had for quite a while.

Its so hard to let these words go. I had put so much meaning into them and to now realize that they were just easy words he probably cant even recall, is very hard for me.

He also used to tell me: "by now you should know me well enough to know that I... ."  justifying his behaviour.

Another thing I noticed was that when he didnt like how somebody else was acting he would usually say "they're still kids... they need to grow up" He told me how he hated when his exgf started crying (in front of others and in front of him - I guess mostly when they were going out) because she "ruined the evening" and that she's still a "child" for doing that. (a red flag that I skillfully ignored) Back then I thought she was the one overreacting... now I can see what most likely happened. he would also always speak about how we have an "adult relationship" now and how were supposed to act accordingly and then went and ignored me for almost a week, oh well.

[jalk]

Yes... .the "you hate me"  is  a keeper of sayings. Also... .my ex BPDer said to me, after she left me referring to her new flavor of the moment... ."I've got the BEST now!"   Nice huh?  I used to be the best. Now she says " You're mean and nasty!" AGHHHHH!    

[beyondbelief]

I hate / love you!  Don’t leave me!

Why does everyone always lie about me?

You should have stopped me from ……

It’s not me/you it’s you/me.

You never take responsibility for anything.

I’ll never binge / drink / gamble / get arrested again.

I don’t need your money, help or anything else.

You can fool everyone else but I know how evil you are.

[Bluepanda]

"i could never push you away"

I bet you could... .

[scotlandthebrave]

A quote from BPDex


"I don't know where this is coming from. I'm not a nasty person. This is me attacking you and I can see that. I do love you and sorry for being horrible to you. On reflection I can see that you are creating a monster in me and I am sorry."

[Very_hard_times]

I think I have some good ones: 

- "I do what I want" (please tell it with a 6 year-old girl tone)

- "you're paranoid", because I told her she was distant while giving me the silent treament

- "I want you to marry me as soon as possible. But I'll stop with my new bf when I am better". No comment.

- "I never lied in my life"

- "I'm sorry I don't know why I'm like this"

- "You'd better leave me for your own sake"

- "We can't anymore understand each other"

- "it's not my fault if he's weak", answering if she felt any guilt having led the father of her Ds to attempt suicide after months of tortures, cheatings and lies.

- "I'll call you next week" after I told her it was finished between us.

- "don't worry, it's nothing, it's not gonna last" about her cheating on me with her new bf

- "you're the best lover that I ever slept with", speaking about our sexual relations

- "I cheated on you because of all the awful things I had to put up with while I was with you". No comment.

- ":)on't worry for the STD I gave you. It's nothing serious". And the winner of the STD is : me   

- "I don't know how you can put up with me"

- "I know I'm not crazy"   ;p

[muddychicken]

I'm like no one youv'e ever been with... .ummm if you mean an ahole. I have!

[DC Daniel]

"Get over it!"  - This could be after a 3-4 day rage, or finding my stuff strewn out all over the floor.

"I always get my way"

"I do/say what I want, when I want. If you don't like it, get out"

"If you just saw things my way everything would be perfect between us"

"I'm not fun. If you want someone that is fun you picked the wrong girl"

"I hate you"

"You have a life and a great job and do whatever you want. I feel like a spectator in your life"

"Stop psychoanalyzing me with your psychobabble"

"You don't have the capacity to love. You don't know what love is"

"I don't trust you. I trust you less today than the first day we met"

"You constantly disappoint me. If I knew you weren't perfect I wouldn't be with you" (of course when I asked her if she was perfect she would rage about something else)

[crushed-not-broken]

My uBPD husband would accuse:

"You NEVER LISTEN to me!"

If I brought up something that he considered negative about him, he would say;

"So, you think I'm a 'LOUSE' ?"

And, last but not least,

"I can't LIVE LIKE THIS!"

If asked what "like this" meant, he could not provide an answer.

[beyondbelief]

"Stop psychoanalyzing me with your psychobabble"  Triggered my memory for an all time classic from a time when I was begging her to get help.

Her – I took an abnormal psych class in college.  The prof told us on day one that at some point during the semester we would all recognize ourselves as having one or another of the diseases.  But in fact we are normal.  Since he knows a hell of a lot more than you do, he must be right about me and since you never took a psych class it must be you that has the problem!

Me – If that were true for everyone then taking a class would be instantly cured of any problems.  We could fix all mental health problems in this country one semester at a time.  Since you are sure everything is my fault and you are fine then let’s both get tested and treated.

Her – (Raging stopped instantly) Silence (for about a week).

[jalk]

Yes! Yes! Absolutely! LOL... .I have heard:

1. I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm like this. (that came after one of her meltdowns.)

     then followed with:

2. Do you still love me?

     and

3. I'm sorry. Please don't leave me. You don't hate me do you?

Also... ."I can't live like this!"

She always had trust issues with me as she always distorted any contact I had with other people. She always felt that either I was flirting or the other person was flirting.  Totally insane. Then she would complain that she had no friends. In actuality, she didn't. Mainly aquaintances.

[muddychicken]

Someone slashed my tires. I'm a single mom and I live alone. I would feel better if I knew it was you.

And then I go on FB to see that her tires weren't slashed. It was her exes that she ended their relationship in 2007 by punching him in the face.

You're his problem now sweetheart! 

[TheSomberlain]

Yes! Yes! Absolutely! LOL... .I have heard:

1. I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm like this. (that came after one of her meltdowns.)

     then followed with:

2. Do you still love me?

     and

3. I'm sorry. Please don't leave me. You don't hate me do you?

Also... ."I can't live like this!"

She always had trust issues with me as she always distorted any contact I had with other people. She always felt that either I was flirting or the other person was flirting.  Totally insane. Then she would complain that she had no friends. In actuality, she didn't. Mainly aquaintances.

Oh god, the irrational jealousy. She could hang with guys whenever she wanted. One day some girl from class recognized me and waved hello and my ex let go of my hand and ran away from me crying. Embarrassing as hell. I was so pissed.

[runninggal81]

"You're my world."

[OTH]

I need to be start being selfish and focus on me (LOL... .Our world revolved 100 percent around her needs and her mood swings)

I don't like the way you talk down to me. (Ummm... .just trying to get answers for your outragous behaviour.)

I had this only once... .after we were broke up but before I went NC for the first time. We actually spent a pleasent day together and this was shortly before she left to go to her place.  I still have no idea what she met. It came out of no where and didn't seem to apply to anything we were talking about. She once told me "why do you have to be so good?" Anybody ever get that one? I still scratch my head about it because it didn't fit. Not to give myself an ego trip... .... .but did she have a moment of clarity?

I don't want us to become just roomates (I never understood that one either... .I see Scupper might have helped me out... .I never heard the next one he has on his list... .I guess that explains it).

I should be able to express my feelings to you (always said after I protest to some rage)