Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
January 20, 2021, 02:32:22 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Harri, Once Removed
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, I Am Redeemed, Mutt, Turkish
  Help!   Groups   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
81
Pages: 1 [2] 3  All   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Quotes From Your BPD During The End  (Read 7568 times)
Overcomingbpd
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: divorced after 2 years
Posts: 584



« Reply #30 on: March 07, 2011, 12:28:54 AM »

Please just give me one more chance. I promise this time it will be different


I love that one too!
Logged
hereforhealing
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: broken up, NC
Posts: 273



« Reply #31 on: March 07, 2011, 02:17:03 AM »

- "I'll always love you"

- "I'll never love anyone as much as I love you, even if I marry someone else"

- "Why do you even love me?"

- "You don't love me, you're just obsessed with me"

- "I never wanted to be with anyone else" (cheated/lied about 3 guys that I know about)

- "You're always mad at me.  If you could just not be mad for even a week I'd want to be together with you"

- "I never said we could never make love again" (after breaking up completely)

- "I'd still want to date you if you could handle it"

- "You know I would never have [been with someone else] if we were in a REAL relationship"  Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)

- "You're my best friend"

- "Even fighting with you makes me feel close to you"

- "I need you"

Logged
TheSomberlain
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 276

aka "Somber"


« Reply #32 on: March 08, 2011, 08:45:19 PM »

I just remembered these

"Why don't you just grow a pair of balls and leave me already!"

"We created an emotional bond that can never be broken"

"Goodbye forever" (x2) Guess forever means 2 month intervals

"You were supposed to be my night in shining armor"



Logged

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
troyvert

*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 16


« Reply #33 on: March 08, 2011, 09:28:37 PM »

"You don't understand me".
Logged
Matyr
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: De Facto...5 years
Posts: 84



« Reply #34 on: March 08, 2011, 09:49:10 PM »

Accused of having multiple affairs with different woman, then in the same breath being accused of being gay... .LMAO

I'm not crazy... .your the one that's borderline... .classic !

Your the best thing that's ever happened to me... .I could replace you in a heart beat

No one understands me like you... .you never listen to a word I say

Jeez, I could go on & on

Logged
chiha
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 190



« Reply #35 on: March 08, 2011, 10:09:30 PM »

"You never loved me"

"You did nothing but use me and play with my heart"

"I will never let you go, we will always be connected"

"All you did was use me for your own needs"

"Please just stay in my life, even if we are not together"

"You are nothing but a liar and my heart is stone cold now"

"Please come over, I just want to see you"

"Things that bother most people like seeing someone in pain or death just don't really bother me"

"The same rules of the real world do not belong to me because I am not like everyone else"

"What is strange is I don't care about all those other people it has always been just you" (yeah right   )


Mind you these are just the tip of the iceburg. It all depended on the day, what suited his needs and how he was feeling at that given time. All of it was nothing but lies and a way to suck me in to the dysfunction. I just cannot believe I was stuck in this as long as I was and beat MYSELF up for HIS emotions. What a sad waste of time.
Logged
sea5045
*******
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1090



« Reply #36 on: March 08, 2011, 10:39:58 PM »

Mine was more like minimizing that she was leaving as if I should not have any feelings or be sad.

"You should be jumping up and down I have a job!"

"We only saw each other 3 hours a week"

"YOu were always at work or school!"

"Remember you didn't like it when I would always do things with my friends"

" I don't want to fight, every time I come into town you are telling me how to feel, to be sad or to this or to that, I just want to live life to the fullest and be happy" (like being with me brought her down or caused all her employment problems)

"I dont' live well with others, I don't sleep well with others, I do best when I make my own decisions and if I have to consider others I am a dick"

"Quit crying , you're always crying"

Raging "I do love you I do miss you, but I have a job! Why do you always think  I'm yelling at you! Well then don't call me".


I tell you this stuff made me feel like I had BPD, like I was somehow out of line for being sad about her relocating... .
Logged
xxostedd
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 119


« Reply #37 on: March 08, 2011, 11:21:15 PM »

"I'm never going to change" "If you can't handle it, I understand. I could never be with someone like me"
Logged
id-crisis
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 249



« Reply #38 on: March 08, 2011, 11:31:55 PM »

-YOU stole MY identity!

I was told I was an "essence thief" on several occasions 

If he handed his "essence" to me on a plate I'd have said "keep it!"   
Logged
id-crisis
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 249



« Reply #39 on: March 08, 2011, 11:35:02 PM »

"No one will ever love you like I did"

Hope not!   Smiling (click to insert in post)
Logged
RanaX

*
Offline Offline

Posts: 11


« Reply #40 on: March 09, 2011, 05:59:04 AM »

I got :

You are a psycho ?

You are my bestest friend in the world  

You are not a man

I will always miss you Smiling (click to insert in post)

Logged
ItsAboutTime
*******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1027



« Reply #41 on: March 09, 2011, 06:31:24 AM »

"We would have been alright if you just accepted that I'm hard and sarcastic instead of getting angry at me"
Logged
gary1958
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1260


« Reply #42 on: March 09, 2011, 11:19:59 AM »

" I am going to go out and find someone to love me for me"

In hindsight, please define "Me"... .oh and be afraid... .be very afraid... .Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)
Logged
ItsAboutTime
*******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1027



« Reply #43 on: March 09, 2011, 11:22:16 AM »

Excerpt
" I am going to go out and find someone to love me for me"

That's one of the silliest things they say. Who else would anyone love them for, the next door neighbor, the mailman?  Who?
Logged
uk guy
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 254


« Reply #44 on: March 09, 2011, 11:22:41 AM »

"If I got pregnant things could have been different"

Yeah I agree! 100 times worse!
Logged
TheSomberlain
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 276

aka "Somber"


« Reply #45 on: March 09, 2011, 01:58:43 PM »

In a moment of clarity--while in the hospital recovering from whiplash (she said broken neck  ) from an accident caused by her reckless driving she said: "I just need to be alone so I stop hurting people"

Those words will forever be etched in my mind. In a lucid moment she knew her compulsion to use people and the damage she leaves behind.

Wonder what will become of her... .
Logged

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
id-crisis
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 249



« Reply #46 on: March 09, 2011, 04:14:41 PM »

Excerpt
" I am going to go out and find someone to love me for me"

That's one of the silliest things they say. Who else would anyone love them for, the next door neighbor, the mailman?  Who?

 

Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)

Logged
alchemist
**
Offline Offline

Posts: 69


« Reply #47 on: March 17, 2011, 05:32:54 PM »

After 6 1/2 yrs... .3 break-ups-2 recycles and a month since I finally said goodbye... .she arrives on my doorstep wasted drunk on her 40th b/day and needs to stay the night because she feels safe with me. I let her in... .make her a bed (not in mine!) and tell our son that momma is sick and will be OK. Moaning and crying about not being loved... .not liked/loved... .how she suffers so much and finally passes out.

Wake up next morning and she's next to me in my bed. WTF, right?

The first time in 6 yrs... I finally get a "light bulb" moment and hear everything I suspected over 6 yrs... as she finally opens up to me.

I AM/I FEEL : Lost-empty-feel hollow-depressed-moody-fearful I will end up alone-dont know how to love-dont know how to commit... .etc etc.



Of course I opened my heart again. Then she told me that I am hot. Sexy. Her knight in shining armor. Best love she ever has had. We have a future together... .but right now I need to be 40... .free and kick up my heels... call it a sabbatical and a mid-life crisis. (BTW... .this is 1 yr to the week that she dumped me... 2 wks later seduces the married man and says the same exact --- I need a break to work on myself... Love you not in love)

But the last word was... .I still love you... .but not in love with you and need this time apart to work on myself. That's why I left you.

WTF... I left you a month ago and you just got done telling me that you still loved me.

And then 2 days later meets a new guy that has been "sweet" on her for awhile and says... .we might fool around a bit... but nothing serious. Besides... .you should go meet a new girl... it will be great for your self-esteem.  Thanks for being so sweet. See you soon and takes our son with her back home 2 hrs away.


PEOPLE- You can't be friends... .because like the last break up... she found a new guy 2 wks later... .put me in friendzone and proceeded to tell me all about the new sex... .how she didn't even like him (married & a cheater) and how that it would not even work out and then says... .I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM. He's going to leave his wife for me and I will raise our children.



RUN -> HIDE -> email and texts if there are kids -> it's all business from here on out. No sympathy... BOUNDARIES! Doing the right thing (click to insert in post)

If you reciprocate a friendship... you will find yourself in bed with her... .seduced... only to hear her problems and no concern at all of yours.  Then she/he leaves and you are back to square one all over again. This just happened to me and now know. From here on out I am INSANE to take her back.

Logged
Howzah
*****
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 544


« Reply #48 on: March 17, 2011, 05:38:20 PM »

I was told I needed time to heal after my dad died, soo... .that excused her cheating, lying, emotional abuse, and manipulation or something

You'd think she would have wanted to be there for me as my best friend and the person she loved more than her husband who was murdered.

There is no explaining it because it's not rational. if you try to rationalize it, it just makes you crazy too.
Logged
doubtful
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 142


« Reply #49 on: March 17, 2011, 05:52:22 PM »

"I new from the start I was either going to love you or hate you" 

classic BPD.

"I always put ppl on a pedestal so high, they have no chance"

"Our breakup was not X's fault <her ex she recycled the next day>, it was yours! you are looking for excueses

to escape responsibility"



Logged
alchemist
**
Offline Offline

Posts: 69


« Reply #50 on: March 17, 2011, 06:05:53 PM »

Here's a good one for you.

I caught someone breaking into my car last year. Gave chase... he had my laptop and I was barefoot and faster than him. Made it to the street... .tackled him and the computer went flying. Next I know... get away car... guy gets in and I have a stabwound to the chest... lacerated arm and a 5 inch deep hole under the buttocks. Of course I survived. Im here, right? It was a hunting knife and I have luck of the Irish or 8 more lives.

Well... as I am on a gurney... drove myself to hospital... told I will have PTSD and that I was 2 arteries close to dying and a lucky SOB. I muster up the strength to say... please call my wife and tell her what happened and that I am ok and off to surgery.

I was released that day and I had to beg & prove that I could walk without crutches... .I hobbled in on those crutches to pay our mortgage the next... .and I drove the 2 hrs to go visit her & my son (separated at this point).

I get there and she tells me I manifested this for all the time I have been mean to her.

The next day... .I retrieve my voice mails... .I'ts her... .on the phone... .screaming  at me for getting hurt and for overlooking the mortgage payment. Irony is... .she is next to me when I am listening and then says... .I was scared and

you didnt call me. Ahhhhh... yes you are right... .I couldnt because I was in a trauma ward but the nurse called for me.

What was it?

Totally messed up sick reaction to me "abandoning" her. It took spiritual work to get past the PTSD and

this forum to realize that this is indicative to their inability to have compassion and lack of understanding. That's what a 5 year old says. And thats how old she was when her mom died. 5 yrs old. Rest my case.

Sad part... .leaving her hurt more than being stabbed 3 times. I can't look back and neither should we, right?

Logged
sunday321
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 118


« Reply #51 on: March 17, 2011, 06:15:43 PM »

I got:-

I'm not telling you to f--- off, there is no-one else, I need time on my own... .

You don't love me

I've got voices in my head

YOU LEFT ME
Logged
TheSomberlain
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 276

aka "Somber"


« Reply #52 on: March 17, 2011, 07:52:51 PM »

Sad part... .leaving her hurt more than being stabbed 3 times. I can't look back and neither should we, right?

That is one hell of a story, Alchemist. And as much as it hurts, no, you can't look back. Gotta walk away from the explosion like they do in the movies. I know about the mental pain. I lost my father right before Christmas when I was 13 and remember opening presents he got me on Christmas day with him gone. It was so traumatizing that I was just numb for weeks. But this BPD sht--it has thrown me for a loop. That's why I made this particular thread about the "things they say at the end" because to me, it is the most hurtful. They spend a good amount of time making you believe that they are your "soulmate" and then backhand you with "You never loved me" and then soon after, you find out you've been replaced in a heartbeat.

At least I knew my father loved me and his leaving was out of his control. It hurt but it made sense. And I could grasp that. This BPD has my brain working overdrive because I keep trying to project rationality to her behavior (it's impossible). Leaves the wounds open a lot longer than they need to be.
Logged

There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
xxostedd
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 119


« Reply #53 on: March 17, 2011, 09:03:18 PM »

Oh  Laugh out loud (click to insert in post) Brother!
Logged
ItsAboutTime
*******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1027



« Reply #54 on: March 17, 2011, 09:30:58 PM »

doubtful's xgf said this... .

Excerpt
"I always put ppl on a pedestal so high, they have no chance"

When I read that quote from her, I stopped for a moment to think about it. Hadn't both of us put each other on a pedestal?  I mean we had very high expectations, so did they. We weren't disordered as they were, so sustaining regarding each other with such lofty expectations is nearly impossible for either of us. If we were both perfect, which is not possible, it would have been a real expectation. Accepting the fact that we aren't perfect is rational. But, they aren't rational, so when the cracks start to show, they bail out emotionally where we don't waiver from love. It's not perfect anymore so they let it go. It's not perfect and we stay because we love them.
Logged
ItsAboutTime
*******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1027



« Reply #55 on: March 17, 2011, 09:37:05 PM »

omg I just re-read that post of mine and I sound like a nutbag over-analyzing and obsessing.           sorry.  Smiling (click to insert in post)   Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)
Logged
sea5045
*******
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1090



« Reply #56 on: March 17, 2011, 09:39:05 PM »

Love the term nut bag, I am fond of dip weed and wack job when looking at myself Smiling (click to insert in post)
Logged
alchemist
**
Offline Offline

Posts: 69


« Reply #57 on: March 17, 2011, 09:39:25 PM »

Another gem:



As she says... .I am not in love with you... .but love you and want an open relationship. A break.



I say... yeah... think I need to sleep on that one.

Next morning... I can't go there with you... .so I guess you are dumping me, no?

Well... I have a crush on this new guy and want to check this out.

Hmmm... ok ... .can't stop you, can I?

Meanwhile I am crushed.

A week later... .on the phone to me. I have a new boyfriend... .do you think it's ok to sleep with him? Do I have your approval... .blessing.

Sure. Go for it. Why not... .he's married and you already seduced him, no? What does his wife have to say about it?

She doesn't know about us.



6 months later... recycle #2  . I ask... why did you tell me you wanted to sleep with this guy?

Well... .I wanted you to know that it was really over. See if you could still be my friend.

I guess I can't.
Logged
Daphnis67
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 57


« Reply #58 on: March 17, 2011, 10:26:35 PM »

Maybe I'm just mentally blocking it all out, but my exBPDgf didn't say any of the things you guys mention at the end of our relationship (i.e., this past week).

I was completely straight-forward with her as to why I need to have no contact with her, and while she was hurt by this fact, the most demeaning thing I can think of her saying during our final fights is "grow up."

Of course... .she just physically abused me at the tail-end of everything, so maybe these things didn't need to be said and any words she could have spewed at me morphed into physicality.
Logged
AlexDP
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 722


« Reply #59 on: March 18, 2011, 07:06:03 AM »

"You just used me for sex, you always wanted sex" (when in fact the last month we had only had sex twice)

"You can't be friends, you will always want me" (when she found out I had gone to the movies with another woman, when we were supposed to be friends)

"Yes. EVERYTHING is your fault. I always loved you. Perhaps in the future you could truly love someone else instead of yourself"
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2021?

Pages: 1 [2] 3  All   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2020 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
40days_in_desert
Ahquei3s
alphabeta
Amethyste
Angie59
ArtistGuy70
AskingWhy
assumezero
At Bay
Avanzando
Baglady
Beneck
bigredneck
Bittlecat
Boll Weevil
calmboom
Cat Familiar
Chosen
Dnmtnbkr
drained1996
Eggshellsbroken
FaintTheGoat
FaithHopeLove
FindingMe2011
Forgiveness
freespirit
GaGrl
ggGreg
Gift to Myself
gotbushels
Harri
hopeandchoices
I Am Redeemed
Imatter33
Jazzy48
jdc
jones54
Jonthan
Katrinalove
Kwamina
l8kgrl
LLgreen
Longterm
lorymac
lovenature
loyalwife
lucidone
Manifest32f
MariannaR
Meridius
Methuen
mgirl
Minttea
Mommydoc
Mutt
narcdaughter2
needPeace
NorseWoman
Notgoneyet
oceanheart
oftentimes
Omega1
once removed
Only Human
otherlife
palynne
PeacefulMom
Pedro
pest947
podsnapG
ProudDad12
pursuingJoy
Radcliff
Raul
Recycle
Resiliant
Rev
Rosheger
Sad4Her
SamwizeGamgee
Sandalwood
SBBayArea
SCM
SerendipityChild
SES
Silverhope
Skip
songbirdtwo
StillStuck
Swimmy55
Teno
townhouse
truthbeknown
turtleengine501
Ventak
vinnie77
Violet00
wavewatcher
wendydarling
WhatJustHappened?
Whichwayisup
whirlpoollife
Wicker Man
WindofChange
worn_out
WTL
zachira
zaqsert

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!