Find myself hyper-aware of other peoples moods and reactions now

[SeekingAdviceinCa]

Having been with my uBPDwife for 14 years I think I've developed a hyper awareness or hyper vigilance of other peoples moods or reactions.  Not just her, everyone.  I think I find myself more on guard and alert around everyone I'm with for their mood or reaction to things. Am I imagining this?  Anyone else have this experience? 

Thanks everyone. I sincerely appreciate and am thankful to you all.

[Ironmanrises]

Yes. Same here. Mine seems to be on overdrive.

[SeekingAdviceinCa]

Yes. Same here. Mine seems to be on overdrive.

Mine too!  I don't know how to turn it off or get it to normal.  I feel like everyone I'm around I am observing carefully to read their moods or their reaction to what I say or do.

[Ironmanrises]

Me neither. I mistakenly thought my close friend of having BPD(her behaviors are BPDish) and that resulted from me analyzing everyones behavior around me. Any rejection, any difference in reaction, facial/tone of voice, etc immediately lights up my warning sirens. I hate this. 

[UnLuckyLady]

Yes, same here. I'm even thinking about past relationships and recalling behaviors... . thinking to myself hmmm... . he might have had Npd, this one might have been Bpd... . Then my mind goes to "holy crap... . I must really attract them to me!"   Would like to think my past and present is all a coincidence, not a pattern  :/

[Surnia]

Its exhausting - I can relate with it.

For me its something I have since childhood. Too much focus on emotions and behaviors from people near me and too less focus on myself. Its daily work to be clear about it. 

[myself]

We can put too many walls up, too.

It keeps us frozen in the past, we need to move.

How much self-preservation means you cut yourself off?