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Author Topic: What do they do when they are alone ?  (Read 7107 times)
hurting300
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1292



« Reply #60 on: October 16, 2014, 03:21:25 PM »

Hurting, the more you talk about your ex (I don't really like that word when there is no closure... .I'd rather say "your invisible gf", the more your r/s with her looks like what I've experienced with my BPD.

In fact, had he been a girl, who knows, maybe he would have done exactly what he did (leaving suddenly and refusing to talk to me) with the baby... .precisely what he feared so much of me doing.

Anyway, time is on our side. We mustn't lose hope. I know that your situation is living hell, but there will be changes, things just can't stay the way they are.

Don't lose hope, keep contacting whoever you can contact, be confident (and you should be, you're acting with honesty), don't feel shy about insisting, shouting your rights to whoever can read or hear it (her friends... .).

You never know what may happen with a BPD person. You said she's driven past your house. She might as well come and knock one day.

thank you for that... I hope she does contact me one day. I'm missing everything with my baby. She knew I would go crazy if she pulled the silent treatment and took the child.
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In the eye for an eye game, he who cares least, wins. I, for one. am never stepping into the ring with someone who is impulsive and doesn't think of the downstream consequences.
Indyan
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated for 15 months, court 4 months ago
Posts: 812


« Reply #61 on: October 16, 2014, 03:22:25 PM »

It still find it weird that my ex never wanted sex, from what i read here they are hypersexual in the beginning... .

I read somewhere that their sexuality is never simple. It's complicated, or unusual in any kind of way.

My BPD seemed to not care about sex at all for weeks on, would then suddenly remember that we had a sex life and approach me, we would have a fantastic time for several days in a row where he would say that "it's so perfect that we should make love more often" (I always agreed)... .and then back to nothingness for 3 weeks or so.

WEIRD.
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Indyan
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Relationship status: separated for 15 months, court 4 months ago
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« Reply #62 on: October 16, 2014, 03:24:46 PM »

thank you for that... I hope she does contact me one day. I'm missing everything with my baby. She knew I would go crazy if she pulled the silent treatment and took the child.

It's very cruel indeed. Any idea what she felt like punishing you for? (I'm NOT suggesting by any means that she was right).
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hurting300
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« Reply #63 on: October 16, 2014, 03:44:57 PM »

thank you for that... I hope she does contact me one day. I'm missing everything with my baby. She knew I would go crazy if she pulled the silent treatment and took the child.

It's very cruel indeed. Any idea what she felt like punishing you for? (I'm NOT suggesting by any means that she was right).

Well... I wasn't taking her lies anymore. I mean i had proof she was lying about guy friends, and talking bad about me behind my back. I don't mind my girlfriend having guy friends but if I can't meet them and you hide it from me then we have a problem. She was lazy and wouldn't work. I had enough. She pretended everything was perfect then while I was at work she moved out and changed her number. She give me the silent treatment once for two days and I swear it got to me. I told her I said what if something would have happened to me? You would have never known because you blocked me on everything. So now here we are. Oh and three weeks prior to the vanishing act, she PROPOSED TO ME.
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In the eye for an eye game, he who cares least, wins. I, for one. am never stepping into the ring with someone who is impulsive and doesn't think of the downstream consequences.
Mr. Solo
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic Partner
Relationship status: Married for 18 years. Separated for 1.
Posts: 117



« Reply #64 on: October 16, 2014, 05:25:12 PM »

It still find it weird that my ex never wanted sex, from what i read here they are hypersexual in the beginning... .

I read somewhere that their sexuality is never simple. It's complicated, or unusual in any kind of way.

My BPD seemed to not care about sex at all for weeks on, would then suddenly remember that we had a sex life and approach me, we would have a fantastic time for several days in a row where he would say that "it's so perfect that we should make love more often" (I always agreed)... .and then back to nothingness for 3 weeks or so.

WEIRD.

My wife used to do and say the same thing. We wouldn't quite go weeks without sex but there were times we would do it multiple times a day, if there was time, for a few weeks, and then for a few months we would go back to doing it every 2-3 days. But I always knew when a good couple of weeks were coming because she would ask after sex, "Why are we not doing this more often?" I guess, just like with a lot of other stuff, she would have cycles.
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Indyan
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Relationship status: separated for 15 months, court 4 months ago
Posts: 812


« Reply #65 on: October 17, 2014, 04:35:57 AM »

Oh and three weeks prior to the vanishing act, she PROPOSED TO ME.

Wow, and what did you reply?
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hurting300
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« Reply #66 on: October 17, 2014, 05:18:56 AM »

Oh and three weeks prior to the vanishing act, she PROPOSED TO ME.

Wow, and what did you reply?

I said no. That's it's my job to ask...
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In the eye for an eye game, he who cares least, wins. I, for one. am never stepping into the ring with someone who is impulsive and doesn't think of the downstream consequences.
OutOfEgypt
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Relationship status: married
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« Reply #67 on: October 17, 2014, 08:43:02 AM »

Yup, it's sad, but if I may be so blunt... .who cares?  They are their own responsibility.

What do they do when they are alone?  I don't care because being "alone" means they aren't with me, and that's a good thing Smiling (click to insert in post)
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hurting300
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1292



« Reply #68 on: October 17, 2014, 10:54:55 AM »

Yup, it's sad, but if I may be so blunt... .who cares?  They are their own responsibility.

What do they do when they are alone?  I don't care because being "alone" means they aren't with me, and that's a good thing Smiling (click to insert in post)

well said. Mine reactivated her Facebook last night... I fear something is about to happen.
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In the eye for an eye game, he who cares least, wins. I, for one. am never stepping into the ring with someone who is impulsive and doesn't think of the downstream consequences.
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