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How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
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Author Topic: Wonder if your ex is happy?  (Read 1909 times)
antelope
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« on: November 04, 2014, 11:33:36 AM »

I usually poo-poo most generic internet lists, but this one,

www.collective-evolution.com/2014/06/28/8-common-traits-of-happy-people-that-they-dont-talk-about/

is particularly good to refer to when you're ruminating about your ex, and whether he/she is 'happy' w/o you or with their new beau... .

Common Traits of Happy People They Don't Talk About:

1. Love Themselves For Who They Are

2. See Relationships As An Extension To, Rather Than The Basis Of The Human Experience

3. Embrace Change

4. Celebrate Rather Than Compare Themselves To The Accomplishments Of Others

5. Never Dwell In Being A Victim

6. They Live In The Present

7. Trust That Everything Happens For A Reason

8. They Don’t Let Money Dictate Their Lives

9. Look Within For Solutions


read the list and tell me how many of those correspond to your ex... .for me, it was none of them!
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Deeno02
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« Reply #1 on: November 04, 2014, 11:48:22 AM »

Wow... .just wow... .
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Hawk Ridge
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« Reply #2 on: November 04, 2014, 12:45:05 PM »

Ditto, Dean!
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pjkbhatia

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« Reply #3 on: November 04, 2014, 03:23:36 PM »

Awesome!

That just made me feel a ton better
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Deeno02
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« Reply #4 on: November 04, 2014, 03:36:20 PM »

Actually, I really don't care if she is happy. This was just fun to read and it's totally spot on.
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fred6
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« Reply #5 on: November 04, 2014, 03:43:10 PM »

Actually, I really don't care if she is happy. This was just fun to read and it's totally spot on.

This is FB post material that would ruin a certain someones day, week, and month. But it's the truth so no harm, no foul. I likey... .
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maternal
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« Reply #6 on: November 04, 2014, 04:03:54 PM »

I know my ex isn't happy.  I'm sure he's putting up a great front, though.

Also, I'm not especially happy myself yet.  Getting there, but not quite.
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bungenstein
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« Reply #7 on: November 04, 2014, 07:24:37 PM »

Happy people don't need to attach to someone else, unhappy people do. They aren't happy, they never will be because attaching to someone else won't solve their problem. Its futile.

Did anyone else find that their ex was constantly ill? Mine had something wrong with her pretty much every week, I believe their state of mind is manifesting itself in their body. They are ill in the mind and ill in the body as a result. Never well, never happy.
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Deeno02
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« Reply #8 on: November 04, 2014, 07:37:26 PM »

Happy people don't need to attach to someone else, unhappy people do. They aren't happy, they never will be because attaching to someone else won't solve their problem. Its futile.

Did anyone else find that their ex was constantly ill? Mine had something wrong with her pretty much every week, I believe this is the state of mind they are in manifesting itself in the body. They are ill in the mind and ill in the body as a result. Never well, never happy.

WOW bung. She has fibromyalgia,  ADD, depression and anxiety. As i have said, ive spent lots of time in the Walgreens pharmacy area waiting on emergency Xanax refills. I would take care of her. I get sick, i was made fun of.
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bungenstein
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« Reply #9 on: November 04, 2014, 07:54:00 PM »

Happy people don't need to attach to someone else, unhappy people do. They aren't happy, they never will be because attaching to someone else won't solve their problem. Its futile.

Did anyone else find that their ex was constantly ill? Mine had something wrong with her pretty much every week, I believe this is the state of mind they are in manifesting itself in the body. They are ill in the mind and ill in the body as a result. Never well, never happy.

WOW bung. She has fibromyalgia,  ADD, depression and anxiety. As i have said, ive spent lots of time in the Walgreens pharmacy area waiting on emergency Xanax refills. I would take care of her. I get sick, i was made fun of.

Exactly, I haven't been ill in years, these people have nothing to envy.
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Startattoo2

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« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2014, 04:36:33 AM »

I'm a bit worried by this.

Before I met my ex I was depressed at being alone for 6 years or so.

When she came along, I was the most happy I'd been in years, I felt confident, on top of the world.

Now she is gone, I can safely say I am 5 things in this top list.

So I guess I'm not happy.

I'm sure she is not happy either, and will repeat the same thing with somebody else.

I'm too co-dependant I think.
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Climbmountains91
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
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« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2014, 06:52:02 PM »

Love it!

My ex will never be happy. He will always drink himself til he passes out, eat like a pig, lock himself away for some days playing on his xbox and computer game dissociating from the world then bounce back on some days with his mental health groups, cpn and going to this weird sex group in a pub with his immature friends. If thats a life then i give up Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)! He will never work he loves benefits to much. I live to see the day he actually makes a change. More chance winning the lottery. Lol!

Im not happy as i have a lot going on in my life at the moment but least im working to get there, he never will, not even for the sake of his daughter.
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expos
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« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2014, 08:10:14 PM »

Did anyone else find that their ex was constantly ill?

Yes!  Some awesome lines that I can laugh at now in retrospect:

"My stomach hurts."

"I have a headache."

"My back is in knots."

"I feel like this relationship is going nowhere."

"I'm just so exhausted"

"I'm so full"

Every week, I'd hear these lines... .OVER AND OVER AND OVER.  I love how in the honeymoon state, when they first latch on to you and validate you, they are the healthiest happiest people that ever existed.  Reality kicks back in and they start complaining!   LOL.
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