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VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?" Parental alienation is when a parent allows a child to participate or hear them degrade the other parent. This is not uncommon in divorces and the children often adjust. In severe cases, however, it can be devastating to the child. This video provides a helpful overview.
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Author Topic: AND... She is back after 2 years.  (Read 7080 times)
JRT
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« Reply #60 on: January 08, 2015, 07:51:35 PM »

Is this why some of them breakup and disappear? Their thinking is that they are attempting to protect the non from their 'crazinness'?
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BorisAcusio
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« Reply #61 on: January 09, 2015, 03:54:00 AM »

Their thinking is that they are attempting to protect the non from their 'crazinness'?

It would be considerate, empathic person's hard choice. Borderlines do not think like this.
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Trog
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« Reply #62 on: January 09, 2015, 04:06:53 AM »

Is this why some of them breakup and disappear? Their thinking is that they are attempting to protect the non from their 'crazinness'?

Haha! Well, not I'm experience. They don't think they are a toxic mess and should go clean up. They just continue rolling down the hill picking up trash and running into people's lives without a thought for them or the destruction they cause. If they 'disappear' it's because they have some kind of new supply, online, flirting, offline, dating, whatever, they are in CONsTaNT need!

I suppose if a BPD wants to recover or is in recovery it could be the case but without that insight I'd have to say NO
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JRT
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« Reply #63 on: January 09, 2015, 10:19:18 AM »

Hmmmmmm... .although I am sure that mine is BPD, maybe she is some different type. ... .I know that mine for certain never recycled and sought another man... .she also admitted more than once that she had problems and needed to see a therapist but never had done so. As I understand now, she IS in therapy so she does understand that she is toxic.
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Blimblam
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« Reply #64 on: January 09, 2015, 10:33:20 AM »

Is this why some of them breakup and disappear? Their thinking is that they are attempting to protect the non from their 'crazinness'?

Some of them do this.
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JRT
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« Reply #65 on: January 09, 2015, 11:02:45 AM »

yeah, it seems so inconsistent with the other accounts that I have been reading... .
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jhkbuzz
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« Reply #66 on: January 10, 2015, 08:47:42 AM »

On the topic of empathy, this is a really interesting thread:

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=130485.0
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Mr Hollande
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« Reply #67 on: January 10, 2015, 10:25:30 AM »

This has been very interesting reading wanttoknowmore. My theory on her disappearing act is that she couldn't handle your demand on her to take responsibility for her actions.
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JRT
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« Reply #68 on: January 10, 2015, 10:37:10 AM »

Thats exactly the status of my ex right now. She had left some property at my house where I finally communicated (via FB, she was definitely stalking me despite cutting off communication) that I was just going to give everything away. She had a friend of hers contact me via IM who demanded that she be able to come and collect the stuff. My demand was that my ex and my ex only come and pick it up AND provide me with an explanation for her disappearing act. I was clear that it would all be gone for good no later than today. So far, crickets.

The property is priceless family heirloom kinda things, non-replaceable things (and makes me wonder if it was an accident that she left it or was it deliberate). It blows my mind that she is willing for me to simply trash it it rather than to face her shame and provide me with an explanation for her actions. This shows me JUST how powerful a grip BPD has ove the rational mind.

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