That was very upsetting reading and you have our sympathies. Certainly a lot of things which could fall under the criteria list for BPD there, if not also other mental illnesses.
Her dysfunctional upbringing is often a major contributing factor to developing BPD and from your writing we also see impulsivity, projection of her actions onto you, the 'want you / don't want you' phases, her huge insecurity and manipulation / guilt tripping using the threat of abortions. She doesn't seem to know who she is or what she wants. All recognisable criteria for BPD.
You've obviously gone through a very harrowing and confusing time whatever her illness is. One thing you don't say is whether you're now accepting it's over for good.. or do you still have some wanting to resume the relationship?
Best wishes
Her dysfunctional upbringing is often a major contributing factor to developing BPD and from your writing we also see impulsivity, projection of her actions onto you, the 'want you / don't want you' phases, her huge insecurity and manipulation / guilt tripping using the threat of abortions. She doesn't seem to know who she is or what she wants. All recognisable criteria for BPD.
You've obviously gone through a very harrowing and confusing time whatever her illness is. One thing you don't say is whether you're now accepting it's over for good.. or do you still have some wanting to resume the relationship?
Best wishes
There's still part of me that wants to be with her, romanticizing the highs and fun times I had with her. Especially since her recent claims of peace, finding god, and being "better." But part of me knows with what she has done, probably will continue to do, there is no hope.





