Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 02:47:08 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Experts share their discoveries [video]
100
Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
Pages: 1 2 [3]  All   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Be honest... Do you wish your pwBPD well?  (Read 691 times)
jaird
****
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 284



« Reply #60 on: March 26, 2013, 07:01:06 PM »

Nope

Hope there's karma  Smiling (click to insert in post)

Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post) Smiling (click to insert in post)  me too!  At least half of me does.
Logged
Eightyfour

*
Offline Offline

Posts: 41


« Reply #61 on: March 27, 2013, 07:47:23 AM »

Wishing a psychopath well? No.

I wish myself well, have compassion for myself and forgive myself for letting this slithering snake suck so much precious light out of my soul too long.
Logged
dkman

*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 13


« Reply #62 on: March 27, 2013, 09:57:47 AM »

The part of me that in somwhat wishes she would take therapy - Look at her own problems and reactions - And change, and eventually get back together - wishes her the best !

But a part of me, hates her, and wishes that she may feel the same thing i felt. Feel as powerless, and in the end loose yourself that i did. All that because i was committed, and respected her as a person into the bone.

I wish her kids the best. fortunately, she is a good and caring mother.
Logged
AJwhatThe

*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 23


« Reply #63 on: March 27, 2013, 05:32:04 PM »

My BDO is so whacked she called the police on the police when they went to her house to arrange a time when I can get m belongings. She has one last opportunity to comply. If she doesn't she will be charged with "possesion of stolen property over $5000"

I wish her well(away from from me), but a big part wants her to not comply and face crimminal charges. Even when having to face a judge she will blame others. This might be what is needed for her to admit she has a problem
Logged
Mightyhammers
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 149


« Reply #64 on: March 27, 2013, 05:35:26 PM »

Wishing a psychopath well? No.

I wish myself well, have compassion for myself and forgive myself for letting this slithering snake suck so much precious light out of my soul too long.

hahahahaha that really made me laugh
Logged
nylonsquid
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 441


« Reply #65 on: March 27, 2013, 05:48:54 PM »

Yes and no. This relates directly to the disorder in which we are confused in how to come in terms with; The dichotomy of character that they exhibit from a loving idealizing person to a tormented & misunderstood victim. I presume we wish people what they deserve and our anger/frustration combined with our stroked egos from idealized memories, created from the internally split personwBPD, makes a confused judgement that mirrors back the disorder.

I think it's healthy to be genuine with how you feel and I sometimes wish her well and other times I don't. I just don't take her seriously any more. She's not an adult.

I might even say I wish her neither.
Logged
Clearmind
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 5521



« Reply #66 on: March 27, 2013, 06:21:50 PM »

Lets keep this discussion balanced - just a reminder that Borderlines are not psychopath's. Very distinctly different things.

To have compassion for yourself we also need to have the understanding or empathy for the suffering of others.
Logged

fromheeltoheal
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Broken up, I left her
Posts: 5642


« Reply #67 on: March 27, 2013, 08:30:46 PM »

Although I want absolutely nothing to do with her, I do love her, and yes, I wish her the best.  Not only for her, but for all of the victims to follow; who knows what carnage she will leave if she doesn't get some help.  May she get well, for all of us. 
Logged
MakeItHappen
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Posts: 116


« Reply #68 on: March 27, 2013, 09:07:31 PM »

I don't quite wish her that well but, I also don't wish her harm.

Karma would be good... .

Logged

Iced
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 115


« Reply #69 on: March 27, 2013, 11:46:22 PM »

I do.

I sincerely loved this person as someone dear to me and NOBODY deserves to struggle through what is basically a chronic disorder with not-my-fault origins (because, really? who in the world wants to sign up and volunteer themselves to develop something like BPD?).

Likening BPD to a chronic illness or a genetic disorder - some kind of health-related disorder whose basis/origins are out of one's control:

Would you wish someone who was formerly close to you who was severely struggling with health problems (so much that it interfered daily with your relationship that the relationship was called quits because it was just too much for everyone to deal with and manage positively) of a non-psych nature well or would you wish for them to fail at moving in a positive direction in their lives?

Managing an emotions-based disorder is, in some ways, not much different than managing some other physical-body or internal-body disorder and counseling is recommended for helping a person to manage either sort of disorder because it IS difficult to manage.

Biggest difference is, where someone with some other chronic illness may recognize that they need help and will perhaps be more likely to be proactive at getting help, the persons with BPD (or any other psychiatric disorder) may not be self-aware enough to.

TLDR; I wish my former close friend(s) all the best.  Yes, there was a lot of hurt involved, but sincerely from the bottom of my heart, I don't believe they - or anyone - deserves to continue suffering.
Logged
WT
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 114


« Reply #70 on: March 28, 2013, 03:10:37 AM »

I waver between feeling indifferent and wishing that karma would kick in.  I don't wish her specific harm or anything, but I feel like she'll otherwise never fully realize how destructive her behavior is and exactly how much she hurt me in the end.
Logged
Surnia
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: 8 y married, divorced since 2012-11-22
Posts: 3900



« Reply #71 on: March 28, 2013, 03:26:53 AM »



Staff only

This thread has reached the page limit and is now locked.  Feel free to pick one of the topics from the thread to start a new one.
Logged

“Don’t shrink. Don’t puff up. Stand on your sacred ground.”  Brené Brown
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: 1 2 [3]  All   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!